Monkey Crushes and Voodoo Sickness
by independenthinker
Summary: Fifteen years in the future, the offspring of J.D. and Elliot is the best friend of Turk and Carla's daughter, Izzy. With such crazy parents this is an insane friendship! But when things turn for the worse, what is a crazy teen to do? Warning: Random
1. Prolouge

Monkey Crushes and Voodoo Sickness

Authors' note: Hey guys, it's us, Indi (independentthinker) and Angel (Keybladeangel34) and we got a new fic for all you adoring fans! Yay! Okay, so maybe not so many fans yet, but hopefully that will soon change! cough, cough hint, hint

Oh, and btw, we got a plot line, as much as it seems like we don't. So for now, ENJOY OUR RANDOMNESS!!!!!!! and please, review so we know that you're out there...

Disclaimer: We don't own Scrubs, but if the owners want to talk business, we're open to it (and any paycheck over 1,000 bucks per)

Prolouge

Izzy and Alex lied on their backs staring up at the stars. "Would you rather... have me break all you toes off, or have to marry... Joshua Fa!" Izzy exclaimed insinuating a new round of their favorite game.

"EEEEEEWWWWWW!!!!!!!" Alex yelled at her best friend. "BREAK MY TOES! BREAK MY TOES!! HE'S TO... BLEAH!!!"

_THWACK!!_

"Oooooooooo my bad! I forgot that you're madly in love with him with a passion!"

_THWACK!!_

"Ow! Okay, okay, he's not that bad I suppose... he's just... AN EVIL MONKEY BASTARD!!!!!"

_THWACK!!_

"Okay, I suppose he's just a little..."

"Icky." Izzy said, scrunching up her face to emphasize her point, "Yeah I know, but still I can't stop thinking about him."

"Alright, let's get out of Mushy- Gushy World and ONTO THE GAME!" Alex said, emphasizing the last part. "So, would you rather eat a monkey raw, or "

"Alive?!?" squealed Izzy. "Or dead. I could deal with dead."

"Well dead, obviously I said raw, not alive. Or tongue a hobo."

"Icky! But yeah, I'll definitely tongue the monkey."

"That...that isn't an option" Alex said, kind of worried "Are you saying you would **want** to tongue a monkey?" she questioned with a quizzical look.

"It's always been a dream of mine. You could even call it a life-long goal." Izzy replied with a satisfied smile.

"I thought your life-long dream was to french Joshua? Or is that pretty much the same thing?" Alex said with an evil grin.

"No it's not the same thing... and I was joking about the monkey!"

"So you do want to french Joshua? Okay then! I'll go call him right now!" she said getting up and sprinting to the house making her intentions quite clear.

"WAIT! THAT'S NOT FAIR!" Izzy said running after her soon to be dead best friend.

A/N: The real story will being in the next chapter. This one was just to get you all prepared for the awesomeness that is us!

Indi: We'll give you shrunken heads if you review!

Angel: NO WE WON'T! WE'LL GIVE YOU SOMETHING NORMAL!

Indi: LIKE DAIRY-FREE, NUT-FREE, GLUTEN-FREE, CUP CAKES! Free of all allergens!

Angel: That's so much more normal! O! and we just want feed back! to those of you who read my story Anti Keyblade Master, I/we just want to know what sucked about this and what rocked about it!

Indi: Leave me out of your advertisements! WAIT! holds up keyblade evilly

Angel: HOW'D YOU GET THAT!?!?

WILL UPDATE ASAP!!

Angel and Indi!


	2. Escaping Our Minds

Indi: HELLO AGAIN! (Said in a British accent)

Angel: wait, you're from Boston.

Indi: Shush! They don't know that! (Now in Irish accent)

Angel: I GIVE UP! JUST TELL THEM WHAT THEY NEED TO KNOW!!

Indi: (in Italian accent) Okay! Here's our first chapter! Sorry that it took a while! But it's pretty long so that should make up for it!

Angel: will it really?

Indi: YES REALLY YOU DUMBO HEAD!

Angel: is this anytime to insult me!? They can read whatever we say you know!

Indi: and who's fault is that?

Angel: … I'll stop talking now and get to typing.

**Chapter 1: Escaping Our Minds**

School was about the worst idea ever. Every student in the world had to agree on this. Some, like Izzy, found it too easy. Some, like Alex, just found it to be a waste of time, and would have much rather be doing more important things. Like sleeping, eating, or gossiping about boys. Though, she DID do all of that in school! But still managed to get good grades.

They were in different grades, so they hardly saw each other. Though they managed. Izzy had Jennifer Dylan/J.D., and Sam in most of her classes, so she made due. Alex had to make new friends that she DIDN'T know thanks to her parents and their friends at Sacred Heart hospital.

There was one person that they all hardly ever saw except at the hospital: Jack Cox. He was a senior in high school while everyone, except Alex, were all sophomores. So that left Alex all alone as a freshman. She didn't really care though. They would all graduate sooner or later. She also felt that when she finished freshman year, that Sam would be a sophomore still. So she got some pleasure from that. But there was one thing that she hated about that:

HER PRESIOUS JACK WOULD BE LEAVING FOR COLLEDGE!!!!

She was madly in love with Jack. Though, she and him argued more than holy hell and if you were a normal person, it was hard to tell if you spent more than 30 seconds in a room alone with them

Well, everyone except Izzy.

But then again she was far from normal. And so was Alex. That's what made their friendship so strong! That and they practically grew up together seeing as who their parents were. Even though they were obvious proof otherwise, sometimes they both verbalized their ideas that their dads were gay for each other!

_Flashback._

"_Do you ever, um, wonder if, well, if my, well, um, our, well, um," Alex said in a stutter._

"_Love each other to much and we're really sisters and our moms are just sergeants?" Izzy cut in and asked._

"_Ya pretty much. THEN WE COULD BE SISTERS!!!!" _

"_But your horrible b-ball skills have proven otherwise." _

"_Mef!"_

_End flashback._

After school Izzy would find a pointless and stupid reason to go over Alex's house. Even though Elliot was like a second mom to her sometimes she really got annoyed. Even though they speak at the exact same speed.

J.D. however loved having the mini Turk around the house. Now was one of those times.

"Well I think that instead of mouseing and twisting that you should definitely comb over fluff forward and add a little bit of spray." Izzy said to her best friend's dad deep in a conversation about hair while they waited for Alex, at the Dorian residence, to get out of detention, AGAIN!

"I never would have thought of that!" he said hugging the teen.

"It totally goes with your face shape!"

"Ya! That it would!" he said staring into space with a lazed look over his eyes.

"Fantasying again, John?" Alex said surprising them both by coming in the door.

"Did you cut detention again Alex?!" her best friend said standing up and throwing her arms in the air to emphasize her frustration.

"No. I gave the supervisor the left over baloney sandwich I had for lunch. He loved it and let me go." She said throwing her backpack on the floor.

"Didn't I tell you it was a good idea to save that?" Izzy said putting her hands down.

"Yes you did, but that's cause YOU wanted to eat it later!" she said walking to the kitchen.

"But I was huuuuun-gryyyyyyyyy!" Izzy replied cupping her hands in front of her and lowering her voice to sound innocent.

"But you're always huuuuwn-gwyyy" Alex said grabbing a soda.

"That's not my fault!"

"Actually when we tested her metabolism was rather high." J.D. stated cutting into the argument.

"Don't you just love having parents as doctors?!" Alex stated.

"Yes, well, I got a surgeon and a nurse for 'rents. So unless I want to be cut open or have some paper work filed it anit so great for me!" Izzy said sarcastically with one eyebrow raised.

"Did I just here you talk bad about your mother's occupation?" Elliot said walking into the room in a bath robe.

"Wait, WHY AREN'T YOU AT WORK MOM!?!?" Alex shouted realizing that she was home.

"My shift doesn't start till 3. By the way, what time is it?"

J.D. checked his watch.

"Here come the 'fricks'" Izzy stated backing away.

"Why?"

"It's 2:57 mom." Alex answered.

"FRICK! FRICK! FRICK! FRICK! FRICK!" Elliot started to run around frantically. "I NEED TO TAKE A SHOWER!!!"

She starts randomly stripping and runs upstairs.

"I'LL HELP YOU!!" J.D. sing songed running after her.

There was a short pause while to two girls looked at each other confused before Elliot's clear voice screams:

"NO YOU WON'T!!!"

_THUMP!_

Alex and Izzy look at the bottom of the stairs and see J.D. lying there.

"She pushed me!" he said quiet and addible voice.

The two teens started to roll around on the floor in laughter at the mans misfortune.

And that's when Alex's coughing began.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Angel and Indi: DUN DUN DUUUUUNNNN!!!

Angel: are you done with the dumb accents yet?

Indi: (talks in different accent for each word) Why yes off course I am.

Angel: (Falls over anime style) Oi!!!!!

Indi: well what's done is done!


	3. It Wasn't The Apple Pie

Indi: WOOT! WOOT! NEW CHAPTER!!

Angel: what's with the 'woot'?

Indi: since when has questioning me gotten you answers?

Angel: Touché.

Indi: Eggzactly!

Angel: Eggzactly?

Indi: you're questioning me again.

Angel: wait, WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH EGGS?!

Indi: wouldn't you like to know…

Angel: I'm not even gonna ask.

Indi: YOU'RE LEARNING!!! (hugs Angel)

Angel: whatever! Just, let's start typing!!

**Chapter 2: It Wasn't the Apple Pie**

"Jonathan, if you're a doctor, why do I have to go to the hospital just for a stupid cough that already stopped?" Alex yelled over the blasting heavy-metal playing on the poor mini-van's speakers.

"My name is John! Wait-call me dad!! Aw, screw it!" he said, punching the radio button to make the obscene cd eject. "Who put this in anyway?"

"Don't change the subject! And it was Izzy!"

Both father and daughter looked at Izzy expecting an angry response, but all she did was look out the window as if she was going to cry.

"You alright Izzy?" Alex asked with concern.

"NO I AM NOT! You are sick! For all we know you have hepatitis or cancer or diabetes or Pneumonia or some other horribly fatal disease and aren't gonna live to see your sixteenth birthday! SO, NO, I'M NOT FUCKIN' ALRIGHT!" Izzy screeched.

"I'm not sick, DAMMIT!" Alex responded.

"Okay, first off, watch your language you two. Neither of your mothers would like to hear that. Secondly, Alex, you very well may be sick, but no, Izzy, not dying. And that brings me to my third point, Izzy, stop exaggerating, she is not about to die, and only one of the four diseases you listed can kill. And the other is pretty curable. So please, both of you, stop." J.D. commanded.

"NEVER!!" Alex shouted.

"grr!" Izzy growled.

"Aw teenagers!" he said with a chuckle.

"What's that supposed to mean Jonathon?!" they shouted in unison.

"IT'S JOHN DAMMIT!!!"

"Who's swearing now?" Izzy said crossing her arms.

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

"Yaaaaaaaa. I'm not seeing anything that's wrong here." Turk said looking at a chart. "And it would be easier if you would let go of her Izzy."

"I'M NOT LETTING HER GO!!" Izzy said hugging Alex's arm tighter.

"Please!" Alex begged. "So you don't have to amputate my arm later, LET HER BE!!!!"

"Uh ok then! An internal doctor will be in to ask routine questions. Like: have you been exercising, eating a regular diet, and-"

"Weeeeelllllllllll, there was something……" Alex began slowly.

"O MY GOD!! WHAT IS IT?!!? WHAT DID YOU EAT!?!? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!?!?" Izzy exclaimed nervously.

"I ATE AN ENTIRE FREAKIN APPLE PIE THAT MY DAD MADE!!! I'M SORRY!!" she exclaimed hugging Izzy almost in tears.

"Um, hon, even I know it wasn't the apple pie!"

IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

Indi: WOOT! WOOT!! NEW CHAPTER FINISHED!!!

Angel: seriously! you have 'woot' issues!!

Indi: HEY!!

Angel: least I'm not questioning you again!!

Indi: gooood point there. WE'RE NOW GIVING YOU MAYONAISE IF YOU REVIEW!!

Angel: WHY!!!?!?!?

Indi: because it's moustureizing on your hair!! and great on bugers!

Angel: (pointedly ignoring) weeeeeelllllll, just review!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Three: What the Hells Wrong With Me?!**

"Well, this is a story all about how my life got twist turned upside down and I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there I'll tell you how I became the prince of a town called bel-air.

"In west Philadelphia born and raised on the play ground is where-"

"STOP SINGING IZZY!!!" Alex shouted. "This is not the time nor the place to be singing! I'm about to get checked by a medical doctor! By the way: why was your dad looking at me first? He's a surgeon!"

"1) There's always a time and place for singing, and 2) I'm not sure. Maybe all the medical doctors were busy." Izzy explained.

"To busy for me?!" Alex said getting giant puppy eyes that were starting to get filled up with tears.

"AAAWWW! Don't cry Alex!" Izzy said, leaping onto her best friend.

"Haha, gottcha! I learned that trick from my paternal guardian."

"Why I otta…" Izzy grumbled.

"Please, wait until AFTER I graduate to murder my parents, I need them for student loan co-signing."

"Alright, but anywho I'm bored, let's play a game."

"Like what, we're in an empty hospital room, waiting for some moronic doctor to come check me out."

"Hot?"

"What?"

"Is this 'doctor' who is gonna 'check you out' hot? 'Cause if so, I'd love to get in on this action." Said Izzy, using a smirk and air quotes as her greatest artillery.

"Hate you."

"Love you too, hun. Now for my game proposition, Soon a few docs will come in and, as you so nicely put it check you out."

"Wait, you forgot your air quotes."

"O no! I mean this literally! Now, as for the game, I propose-"

"Wait, you wanna propose to one of them!?"

"No! though that would be funny. Anyways: I say that we have a contest to see who can make more doctors leave the room."

"I like where this is going! So, what are the rules of the game, and what does the winner get?"

"1) there are only 2 rules. Those rules are, 1) stop asking me stupid questions and 2) anything goes."

"I feel bad for the doctors that havta put up with us."

"As well you should. And 2) the winner gets, an apple pie!" Izzy said with an evil smirk.

"AW! NO! WHY!?!?" Alex started screaming. "ANYTHING BUT APPLE PIE!!"

"Ooooooh! That rhymes and here they come!"

Just as she said that, Dr. Cox, and the girls fathers entered the room.

"Oh what the hell Agatha! Why do I havta check out your daughter?!" Dr. Cox yelled.

"Oh! You wanna check me out?!" Alex asked. "But Jack already does that enough!"

"You want some ice for that burn?!" the three other people in the room said.

"I'm gonna ignore that horribly pitiful dis just as you seem to ignore the fact that you're white." Dr Cox said to the room in general, though it was obviously directed to J.D.

"Let the games begin…" Izzy whispered to Alex with a small smirk.

"Watch and learn, little girl." Responded Alex.

"Um, Chicita, I'm 16 months older."

"Shut up. Now, onto the game. I will begin-"

"What are you girls doing?" Whispered J.D., suddenly appearing on Izzy's right. In order to pointedly ignore him, the girls turned to their left, only to find Turk saying,

"Hey, don't exclude me! I want in on this fun too!"

"Can we actually act like big boys now?" Doctor Cox asked, instantly summoning the two to his side.

"Attack one." Alex whispered. Then, speaking at normal level, she asked Doctor Cox: "So, do you want to approve of my marriage with your son, or do we have to get married in Vegas?"

"That's it! I'm outta here!" Dr. Cox said in a huff as he left the room.

"Okay then!" J.D. said a little worried. "We'll just run a few routine tests to see what the hells wrong."

IIIIIIIIIIII

(multiple tests later)

It had been a few hours since Alex had been admitted into the hospital and was in her hospital room with Izzy, who was still on her arm, and didn't plan on letting go.

"When the hell are the results gonna get here!?!?" Alex shouted, fully frustrated at the long wait.

"If they show that you're gonna die than I don't wanna see them!!" Izzy shouted, squeezing her arm harder.

"LOSING FEELING IN MY ARM THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!"

"Well, I'm not gonna let God take you away from me!" and as and after thought: "Least not yet. You're defiantly gonna die first!"

"O gee! Thanks! That makes me feel so much better!"

"You know it's the truth!" she said smacking her in the arm, still holding on might I add.

"You shouldn't say that while I'm in a hospital."

"We both know I shouldn't say that, ever. But since when has that stopped me?" Izzy said off-handidly while starring at the door.

"Hello, ladies" came a voice from behind them.

"Hi Janitor" said the girls in unison, not even looking back.

"Pneumonia, you have pneumonia. You'll survive." And with that, he strode from the room.

THE END!


End file.
